Saturday, April 15, 2017

Give Me Something

Small talk is awkwardly painful for me. The attempt at idle banter that neither person is really interested in, but feels obligated to maintain feels like nails on a chalkboard to me and I spend most of the time planning my escape while trying to politely keep up my side of the conversation. But... if you just give me something, some bit of conversation that you are interested in or passionate about, or something that makes you laugh although it probably shouldn’t, then I can talk with you for hours. Interesting people fascinate me. Please, be engaging and know that some days it’s harder for me to start the conversation because I have been trained to “speak when spoken to” since I was a child and sometimes I revert to that and simply need someone else to speak first.

I am normally a pretty relaxed person who can go with the flow. That being said, I like to have a general idea of what’s going on and when and when the plan in my head has a wrench thrown into it, I can get wound up and start to freak out. I’m not talking a full-blown Chicken Little and “The Sky is FALLING”, but sometimes I get spun out and can’t help wondering when the next shoe is going to drop and what calamity is going to befall me next. It’s at that time, you can just give me something; be the calm in the storm. Stand firm and solid and maybe even let me put one hand on you to steady myself a little while I get my bearings and catch my breath and center myself again. I don’t need a savior. just someone who isn’t going to run at the first sign of a windstorm.

If you find you are interested in me at all, you have to give me something to work with. Something more than the classless turnoffs I experience too often by thirsty boys with no integrity. If you’re here just to get laid, just be honest about it. I will politely decline and we can both move on. Open and honest communication about what we both like/dislike and what we both want out of a relationship is so important. I’m not looking for the magic answers, I’m looking for the truth. YOUR truth. If your truth and my truth sync up, great. If not, again, we will say goodbye and move on.

If we get this far, and discussions of entering a dynamic begin, know that it won’t be simple, easy, or quick. I come from the school of thought that a good D/s relationship takes work and the titles don’t mean a thing unless the actions are there to back them up. We will both have a lot to prove through our actions and it will take time, but if we have gone about this the correct way, we will really enjoy each other’s company and will have no problem spending that time together getting to know each other they way we need to. And when you come to learn that I am a strong woman who has had only herself to rely on for most of her life, and I struggle in my submission at times because of that, I need you to give me something. I will need you to be firm, but fair and patient. Just as I will need you to be understanding and consistent in your dominance, I will strive for that in my submission and that is what I will give to you. I will give you me.

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